"Love of the type that chase after a star " : He is your object after all, be still you " love a

Introduction

Somebody chase after a star to regard as a love, also somebody concludes love a kind to chase after a star. A kind of circumstance is in the head instantly China society is common, after all some star love, bring about large area to take off pink, have even radical person anger and from incomplete; Some star insanity help strength " Tu Bang " , wear below final special, bring public opinion in an uproar.

Although make a person be left speechless with wonder or fear, do not make the person feels accident however. However, if be opposite " love beans " so mad infatuation and adore, appear in amative relation, will that be how a picture? Today, we guide everybody one case to undertake one time seeking to the psychology chasing after a star in love.

Chase after a star: One kind drafts human relations in society

In our endless lifetime, almost everybody forereach star. And the period that makes a star in this the whole people, the relation between God and vermicelli made from bean starch becomes more close it seems that. Be in what put forward in a research 1956 the earliest to draft human relations in society by psychological investigator Horton and Wohl (Parasocial Relationships) , use those who describe the relationship between this kind of God and vermicelli made from bean starch namely.

The picture originates network

Those who draft human relations in society build the media such as based TV, network to be opposite the report of star celebrity, we pass these media to them the story of appearance and behavior knows them, although we are very much,the person did not star with these people had had direct contact and communication. From the acquaintance of one-sided of vermicelli made from bean starch, resemble the attaching of generation to antithesis of vermicelli made from bean starch, it is so called draft human relations in society.

Although we know what the imagination comes out to relation of this kind of attaching is us, still can regard this kind of imagination as however true. Almost none exaggerative, if you also (ever) have the treasure boy that belongs to oneself (the girl) , you can understand " love beans " that one Chichun water that answers eye to laugh to be aroused in the place in heart of vermicelli made from bean starch, as good as experiences mediumly at real love.

This kind drafts human relations in society to be considered as the development of function of a kind of normal society in childhood times and adolescence, in growing to be in individual for, drafting human relations in society is the source that develops important affection and social function. However, indulge chase after a star to him vermicelli made from bean starch for not be a favour, the attaching relation dominant that imagines when a kind reality lives, vermicelli made from bean starch can cost all time, experience to be on him God body, can appear even try to get in touch with God, or more the extreme idea of God of contact of close quarters ground, annoy the bastard meal of star for instance.

The picture originates network

According to relevant research, indulge the essence that chases after a star is considered as a kind of addiction. The basis is absorbed -- the model that become addiction (Absorption – Addiction Model) , the individual meeting with oneself self-identity relatively ambiguous mechanism and oneself God establishs the relation mechanism that a kind of psychology absorbs, will satisfy the need with ego self-identity and contented ego with this.

Consider to make clear, the cent that chase after a star is 3 administrative levels:

The recreation chasing after a star of lowermost administrative levels is gregarious to chase after a star (Entertainment-social Celebrity Worship) , of the recreational ability that this kind of expression that chase after a star resembles for dual and social central issue love, for example: "I and friend like to talk about me " love a beans " the business that has done " , "Know me ' love beans ' story I can feel very interesting " .

The expression chasing after a star of the 2nd administrative levels is strong individual trend (Intense-personal) , what this kind of manner that chase after a star appears is strong to God actuation sense, for example: "My " love a beans " the Soul Mate that is me " , "I often can think of me " love a beans " , although occasionally I also do not think such " .

Most the expression of the extreme that chase after a star chases after a star for brim sex pathology (Borderline-pathological) , mirrorred the clammy infatuation that individual antithesis resembles. For example: "If I am rich, I can buy money go off with ' love beans ' has used thing " , "If organic meeting is mixed " love beans " meet, "Love beans " want me to do a few illegal businesses, I also am willing to do " .

If such sounding you still can feel the issue does not close oneself, so envisage, one day, you admire long already treasure boy in the heart with yours (the girl) love, besides everyday confuse younger sister to confuse eye of younger brother star, the time is long, can your heart lay a few burdens? (or won't? You are quite then fierce still, that looks on downward then)

When him (she) when getting along with others, you can feel very envious;

Relation of this paragraph of love lets the other concern that you valued in the past and hobby become so not important;

Your spouse glom on to you, worry about him one day which (she) can go beside you lose;

The partner that becomes you is not beside you, you can feel empty, doleful, dull;

You need regular suggestion, be opposite in order to know a partner your love;

Get along to have more time with your spouse, you can cancel the appointment with him family, friend;

You long to get complimentary;

You hope to have a few control to his spouse desire, they are not done by your apiration, you can feel distracted;

Of the spouse it is more important to approbate the ego that compares you;

You think you can turn opposite party into oneself the person in ideal;

Your apt spouse figure Utopian, if he (she) disappoint your expectation, your meeting heart breaks down

...

Listening to be familiar with? If you have these features more or less a few, so you need what vigilance lacks independent consciousness this kind to depend on model character looks for you.

Depend on model spouse (Dependent Lover) it is a kind of such phenomena. A kind of healthy affinity depends on a spouse between already interdependent, become independent each other again. Depend on however model because,the spouse is probably provide for oneself, because be opposite,be probably the agog longing of love, they treat a lover as treating " love beans " be full of in that way infatuation, perfect illusion and adore. They lower themselves ceaselessly, hold the lover in both hands even on altar, with the with attitude him look upon that look up at lover of a kind of infatuation.

A film related a such stories, hero is the star swimmer of the school, accident and beautiful heroine encounter. She falls in love at first sight to him, from now on later, she begins to be obsessed with establish a kind of relationship with him. She uses email and short message bomb this, date with his adversary, make him angry annoy, use a shot in the arm brings about qualification of this match be cancellinged.

More mad is, she for his possess oneself of, killed his mate, try to kill his cummer. Is the cause of all these after all she is infatuated with to his insanity and illusion or Baalism place bring about? Be afraid very difficult to sum up in a word. But undeniable is, the insanity when will chasing after a star and depend on in taking love to concern, it is you absolutely bad, I am bad, everybody is bad.

Cannot cast in amative relation recall astral mentality however, become the sweet heart " love beans " , the balance of the relation can tilt slowly, as time passes, the couple of imparity concerns to also be formed subsequently, entail untold troubles.

One, form " flattery character "

The one party that is flattery and the one party that are pleased can be divided in the relation of imparity. "Flattery character " it is a psychological concept that just appears recently, a lot of people originate to its impression a few programs, but actually, a lot of psychologist already did research to it.

Breath out B of Li Ya spy. Black is used " E " will show the woman spirit that always is ego of others consider, sacrifice is idiosyncratic. In another book " the courage that is fed up with " in, author Japan philosopher bank sees one man from span angle of domain of psychological, philosophy undertook reflection to flattery character, also put forward how to can cast off the idea that the hope is liked by everybody at the same time. For instance we should face up to ourselves, not be hundred affirmation, admit oneself however, promote ego acknowledge, can have thereby " the courage that is fed up with " .

2, produce mental force

Meanwhile, also existing " passive " the circumstance that goes pleasing, if the force that be in is kept in feeling, force one party to must please another. Speak of force, people often can think of the harm with the visible body such as the armed strength. But it is actually in amative relation, sometimes the force of mentally makes a person get hurt more, besides body force, there still are mental force and sexual force in domestic force. Mental force English is Moral Harassment, also call weak force. The action that this often includes among them has, verbal menace, defilement, calumniatory and calumniatory, disregard, harm proper pride, passivity is accepted and apathetic is to suffer cruel person typical feature.

In the circumstance too numerous to mention one by one that the vermicelli made from bean starch on the concert of star screams to faint even. A lot of people feel such vermicelli made from bean starch is too mad, hysterical, the problem of invigorative respect.

In the concert, water bottle of mineral spring of cast of Xiang Mingxing of vermicelli made from bean starch. The picture originates network

But basis " England is clinical psychological magazine " publish a research to say, wrap around the vermicelli made from bean starch of head person the hysteria disease in character psychology exam (namely hysterical) notch not tall, also did not discover the tendency of mental problem.

Does according to standard of evening of writer of American popular science, guest Ni Yazhou establish M.d. of university college of medicine to give birth to Jordan? The research of Liu Yi Si, heartbeat of our own neurological responsible control, perspire, excited, sober, weep etc, exceed our subjective control. See the phenomenon when God when vermicelli made from bean starch, it is the expression of excitement of this kind of nerve. For instance hemal dilate, heartbeat is decelerated, bring about blood pressure to drop suddenly, faint etc. Researcher thinks, the fanaticism that chase after a star can satisfy the affection need with special adolescent. This kind of fanaticism did not reach psychological morbid state actually or the degree of mental obstacle.

But some vermicelli made from bean starch believe any a bit suggestion of God is expression loves to his, this is in the semiotic standard of mental division, the patient is certain someone is loving him greatly, and in fact when the other side does not have this meaning, belong to disease of a kind of spirit " loving covet " , this needs to went to a hospital diagnosing.

From psychological angle character, as a result of us major person is lived daily medium trifling surround with bagatelle, what can place oneself so is yearning at another object, if appear in order to compare glorious figure in the star before the masses, they bore the weight of the expectation that vermicelli made from bean starch lives to ideal. They can help vermicelli made from bean starch obtain replace a gender to satisfy, the psychological drop with daily life was offsetted on certain level. And this kind of psychology era enters love in, meet the mate oneself naturally Utopian, if one day you discovered your spouse is the Everyman with oneself only, angst uneasiness and break down the mood may come at any time.

According to the narcissism theory in psychology, fuluoyide is in 1914 " by narcissism: Introduction " in put forward " primitive narcissism " existence. "Then we formed a such ideas: Existence compares much be absorbed in to the original force of ego (Original Libidinal Cathexis) , subsequently the one part of this be absorbed in projected over the object, but its foundation part still was withheld come down. The relation of it and object be absorbed in, the concern that extends projecting pseudopodium with respect to the body that resembles amoeba and it is same. The concern that extends projecting pseudopodium with respect to the body that resembles amoeba and it is same..

Feeling of pour into of vermicelli made from bean starch and financial capacity are on God body, also be the process with a kind of contented ego actually. General and individual narcissism is not insalubrious, only individual and excessive narcissism just is insalubrious. No less than is measurable regard example as God, to its study can bring positive result, but exceeding indulges to be able to let a person lose his, affect ego acknowledge and individual development.

Love and not be equal to need. The accredit of two people need that loves each other truly, esteem and accept the other side.

These things appear in affection to depend on rarely model in partner concern. Real love is him understanding, him love, give another person it next. This is the kind that two people create happy life jointly.

If you had been immersed in the relation mode that a kind of affection depends on, you should spend bit of time possibly to discover ego. This sounds a bit terrible, but if you can be accomplished, with respect to meeting discovery, learning him understanding, him love is the most powerful issue that you select to do.

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