Come out to mix want to return sooner or later.
This is a good sense. The might of this good sense, these days again by Cui Yongyuan confirm.
Look with the result, cui Yongyuan is a revelator. Feng Xiaogang of his fact hammer, the sword points to Liu Zhenyun, play Fan Bingbing, court action takes the gate of vitality of the other side continuously.
Cui Yongyuan head wears baseball cap, recreational person is set. Between Tan Xiao, suck a cat at the same time, at the same time subjective adversary ash flies smoke destroys.
Have express one's gratification of clap of masses eating melon, unexpectedly its are assist ethical hero. This thing from the root on say, pure belong to kind and enmity of individual of Cui, Liu, Feng, the the Three Kingdoms is killed.
As to costly group each tall person steals law of dodge a tax play a way, world of experience of book list gentleman is not dark, not buy one word.
Chinese the ancients says: "Gentleman house is easy with wait life, lilliputian travel danger with fluky. Lilliputian travel danger with fluky..
Means, gentleman is magnanimous swing, , await the arrangement of the destiny. And Lilliputian always attempts the behavior with adventure, fluke.
Everybody is the variable in social change. Make conscience money, make clean money, just be correct path.
Return the motive that this thing begins Cui Yongyuan, you can discover, this " murder case " , origin is unsuccessful apology nevertheless.
Picture origin | Yestone.com
01
"Be be, I am to want to make fast money, I did sodden thing "
One's early years has a newsreel, cry " a day when direct Feng Xiaogang " .
In newsreel, just becamed famous before long Feng Xiaogang expresses clearly:
"Like me this is planted the child of family background of family of urban petty bourgeois, want to think up poll ground, have to think method to please others all the way. Making others glad just is the first, promote high as to myself, that is not important. That is not important..
" mobile phone " when showing, set high likeness because of the real person of film set and Cui Yongyuan, bringing about an audience to guess off the rails chaos is done in drama is in suggestive Cui Yongyuan, brought tremendous psychological scar finally to Cui Yongyuan.
That moment does not have small gain, small letter, want to clarify do not have the ground go, cui Yongyuan's anguish cans be imagined.
But what direct Feng Xiaogang and pay no attention to archetypal Cui Yongyuan is grouchy.
With Feng Xiaogang the state of mind at that time, feel the anguish that is less than Cui Yongyuan most probably.
Be afraid in his eye, you subdue the elder brother at this o'clock to be compared with me, that does not make a thing. Cui Yongyuan's program attends later, feng Shui: "Think teacher following Cui opens a fun namely. "Think teacher following Cui opens a fun namely..
It is the consequence of this fun only, not be in anticipation, did not apologize so, also had not thought Cui wanting a side removes an effect.
Saw Feng Xiaogang's response, cui Yongyuan disappointed in the extreme, feel public morals day falls, popular feeling is not ancient, 3 view all are destroyed. But at that time, he is right " mobile phone " playwrite Liu Zhenyun is " give the wrongdoer a way out " .
Cui Yongyuan is being accepted when interviewing, say, liu Zhenyun ever apologized 3 times to him.
Mix the 3rd times for the first time, his reaction is " calculated did not carry " . But the 2nd, he one excited, scolded Liu Zhenyun one minute, say: "You want to make fast money namely, forge a name, ability this sodden thing! Ability this sodden thing!!
Liu Zhenyun nods again and again: "Be be, I am to want to make fast money, I did sodden thing. I did sodden thing..
Cui Yongyuan still is touched quite at that time, feel Liu Zhenyun's apology is thorough the soul, the heart says: The writer is different, still have intuitive knowledge, the likelihood is driven by the desire namely, temporarily muddleheaded.
But absolutely did not think of, lie between when old, skip suddenly again piece " mobile phone 2 " , cui Yongyuan of course scamper!
Picture origin | Yestone.com
02
"If the apology is useful, even the police is dry "
Saw an information yesterday: Fanbing puts anguish on the ice to shed tears to apologize again and again, cui Yong Yuanmeng is unripe retreat meaning. Someone says, xiaocui how so fast " Song " ?
The edge is to have facts one wishes to hide additionally here, book list gentleman is bad absurd from conjecture. Dan Xiaocui " Song " , because he feels right to Fanbing is put on the ice,be " Song " can accept completely, of Yu Huai of true be troubled, still be Liu Zhenyun.
Perhaps you can say, liu Zhenyun has 3 times after all apology, the Feng Xiaogang that crosses apology than be being done not have completely is much stronger, is maybe this to treat unjustly him really?
Proviso Chan Jun thinks, the possibility of injustice is little.
A lot of people think, should speak only " I am sorry " or " close watch apology " be an apology, actually otherwise.
The apology learns expert Allan · Lazaer has written a book, be called " apologetic force " , pointed out a good apology should have 4 essential factor clearly among them:
One, acknowledge a mistake;
2, put forward to explain;
3, show self-condemned, ashamed wait for behavior and manner;
4, undertake compensating.
And bogus apology cans be found everywhere, lazaer is in the book citing:
Say to you when somebody " everything what what I do for me apologizes to you " when, he / she did not apologize adequately, because of him / the act that she does not admit to have affront, think possibly even to be put in affront far from. Another common example is: "If you felt to get hurt, then I am very sorry. " this acknowledges a mistake to contain additional requirement not only (be like " feel to get hurt when you only, I just am met sorry " ) , the sensitive and irritable ability that still alluded you even is the germ of the problem.
So, although particular case is unidentified, but the description according to Cui Yongyuan, of book list gentleman unscrambling is: Liu Zhenyun's manner is not cordial, at least, he is failure on apologetic technology.
Apologize from the 2nd especially in, liu Zhenyun nods again and again saying is this reaction in light of, very he did not cherish it's hard to say a kind " let Cui Yongyuan cast energy of life enough, fool happy have to " psychology.
Picture origin | Yestone.com
03
We underestimated apologetic force
Apology this thing, it is so difficult to have? Still have really.
" apologetic force " the author pulls Za Erceng to cross an interview via doing, the psychological activity that allows people to talk about his not to wish to apologize --
"The apology is very difficult, you must lower your head to the other side, that meeting makes you feel to was like you to be defeated. That meeting makes you feel to was like you to be defeated..
"Say ' I am sorry ' very difficult, because that will bring ashamed sense, force me to face me to be able to hurt the fact that the person errs. Once recognize fact, compunctious move came. Compunctious move came..
Of coincidence is, xiaocui has encountered the work that needs an apology, and, quite serious still.
2005, cui Yongyuan accepts in when interviewing, say:
"A compere is making our stand talk show, interview an artist, this artist is very devoted, very be indifferent, compere also is in spot appeal everybody learns to him. After this compere comes out, say however ' this is foolish × cooperates really today ' ... when I see this program, he (that compere) crying, I vomit. I vomit..
Although small Cui Bing does not have designation path to surname, but the public guesses, he is to be in suggestive " artistic life " compere Zhu Jun. The worry that this causes to Zhu Jun and anguish can be imagined.
Old later, cui Yongyuan apologizes to Zhu Jun on small gain:
"Pass to be described at ambiguous in those days to me, make Zhu Jun suffers misunderstanding to be felt by harm of for no reason apology remorses! Show earnest Xiang Zhujun and family to bow excuse! Learn Zhu Jun fight press ability and broad bosom. Learn Zhu Jun fight press ability and broad bosom..
Not only such, in " artistic life " celebrate the spot 10 years, cui Yongyuan still appearances designedly, bow to Zhu Jun again apology:
"I made a mistake a few years ago, let Zhu Jun cover loss, apologized already formally to him. But I feel small that apology on rich, and likely to his harm disproportionate. (bow) I am sorry! (bow) I am sorry!!
Zhu Jun very feel grateful: "Actually this behavior of Xiaocui makes me true admire, can accomplish without a few people such, he can follow me completely to say this thing under the counter, but he chose to be on this arena, say so to wide audience, I think this is Cui Yongyuan, this is his disposition. This is his disposition..
Say a Cui Yongyuan " cannon " , actually, this apologizes effectively namely absent place causes " murder case " .
" mobile phone " the place in the with Cui Yongyuan a lot of coincide on the clue, book list gentleman no longer give uncecessary details, with Cui Yongyuan is mixed at that time " truth fact says " the person is angry, saying is not suggestive estimation nobody letter.
In fact, after the film is shown, a lot of people are being chased after interview Cui Yongyuan, ask him " can you be in charge of to marriage? " be in even his daughter the school to be able to be asked by classmates, a few lovers does your father have?
So old, a word that book list gentleman guesses the hold back in small Cui Xin to wear is:
I am regarded as off the rails broken bits male, when wife, daughter is gesticulated, your Liu Zhenyun, Feng Xiaogang is in which, what how get over comes do you know to I am? How do I give Zhu Jun apologize, do you fool me when fool?
A lot of moment, we emphasize forgiveness too, and the force that underestimated an apology:
Although it may be a few speech only, OK however solace popular feeling, stroke smooth scar, let two people, two families, even two countries put down antagonism and guard, the trend has more constructive with significant concern.
Cui Yongyuan this cannon, somebody sees evade taxes evade payment of a tax, somebody sees difference between the rich and the poor, return somebody to see " costly group is really random " .
Proviso Chan Jun feels, to our Everyman character, this is actually god-given opposite communicates a class, can let us see, have what kind of accumulated rancor to the evasive meeting of error and responsibility, lacking effective apology is how to be the relation of person and person to bury issued time bomb.
When accepting pear video to interview, cui Yongyuan expresses, do not accept an apology, but dissatisfactory also to oneself practice, hope " tall person gives directions " , let what this thing has peace settle way.
Book list gentleman is not tall person, but want me to say, best settlement in means, effective apology is indispensable.
A lot of people solve what the apology counts event and end, but " apologetic force " in say, the apology is negotiation beginning actually, it is the first situation that settles dispute.
Book list gentleman is not Liu Zhenyun, Feng Xiaogang, but in the life, we ever had had such experience: Had caused harm innocently to other of purpose, because apologize impertinently,the fault is added on means fault again, the brim that makes human relation trend dangerous.
Learn effective apology, not be to let oneself " lose face " , " install grandchildren " , contrary, by the communication that the apology begins, it is a kind of cultured attitude, it is the means that a kind of civilization solves a problem.
Had disclosed like small Cui Ceng " public toilet type " life credo in that way --
Forward one half step, civilized one stride.
