Should chase after astral a group of things with common features to become father and mother, want t

Accompany every parents and child, it is better to become oneself.

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Also once having oneself to love a beans us, also became father and mother nowadays! Present you, can brave before the child chase after a star? Want to chase after a star wildly, the daughter says however: Then you cannot be in charge of me to chase after a star! Be at ease no less than letting him child goes chasing after a star, follow the child to go together, can be you cold-shouldered by the child? ! Inner good kink, will listen to an expert how to say.

(picture origin: Shutterstock)

Author: Manage of king idea center treats a Wang Yizhong of clinical psychology division

The child is big, want to do the business that him dot feels happy? But when the child gives out crosscurrent, feel deeply pained, learn to be communicated well with the child, whether does him postmortem have careless omission, let him understand your joy at the same time, also learn to listen attentively to the child's be fond of, close child communicate from share well begin.

Ask: I want to chase after a star wildly, but 10 years old of daughters say to me " you went, I chase after a star to also cannot be in charge of me after " , how do I want to abandon or should be communicated?

Answer: Be in daily life or grow in the process, we are very natural to at the moment or the specific person on screen, be full of glad meed to adore, want to understand more further even about this individual all.

We always expect all round the chase aftering that serious domestic person can support him the star serves as.

But cannot forgive with respect to what trouble the child, to oneself the behavior that chase after a star is oppugned somewhat. In the communication process with the child, do not fall to have completely first devoid, chase after or do not chase after so extreme and absolutely.

? Reduce mad cost:

Become aware is our wild action sudden? Let the child beside cannot be adjusted temporarily, do not know him place why thing.

Advertent oneself act that chase after a star, whether to let the child feel the idea of pa Mom is on angle love a beans, and pay close attention to theirs less, call out come alienated is negative experience.

Get in what chase after a star with break between, we need set to stop damage site. This is the process that a kind of ego becomes aware. Let chase after a star to maintain constant temperature, maintain a kind of long temperature, is not move of temporarily eruptive formula.

? The happiness that loves a beans is idiosyncratic:

Share together with the child, what the place love a beans that oneself admire in the heart has is attractive and idiosyncratic.

No matter be endowment, appearance, talent, effort, humorous, wait for a person to play, acting, singing, setback bears force or break through a challenge to wait.

Avoid to let the child chase after astral impression to his, it is to stay in only right onefold this " person " outside , lovely chase after blindly esteem.

? Admit each other be fond of:

Try to listen attentively to with the person that admits the child to also like and part, come from TV program or animation cartoon to wait for example.

In the process of listen respectfully, do not want those who have critically or overmuch reason to deliver first.

Be willing to be shared with us when the child, the example in also making us organic can understand child mental view was what to be full of idiosyncratic.

Letting child sense be chased after a star is time very cheerful itinerary. There is excitement here, expect, surprise, have the effect that express presses even. In the meantime, the understanding course that human affairs content pays close attention to to understand adequately before also letting the child know chasing after a star is a kind of cross-eye.

(picture origin: Shutterstock)

Ask: Daughter of junior high school confuses Han Xing, want to buy thousands of yuan concert entrance ticket with money given to children as a lunar New Year gift, I feel inappropriate, she says " why some classmate is OK " , how should reply?

Answer: In close child communicate on, the proposal jumps 2 minutes too fast first (travel ／ is no good) footing. Avoid to let the child feel we are to be in at the beginning restrict him, reject him, and cause the child not to want to be communicated with pa Mom in the future.

One, let the child persuade his.

Offer support and affirmation first to the child's interest and hobby. Tell him to cannot spend money given to children as a lunar New Year gift to see the reason of the concert with its, be inferior to letting the child tell us, his blame goes cannot reason.

Former, let the child easily appear because of be being denied negative sentiment, bad parentage.

Latter, the demand that lets the child practice wanting his to do a thing practices clear expression, see parents whether can be persuaded again.

2, the reason with clear and inappropriate ego.

Think in the light of oneself inappropriate reason, the part that oneself worry about undertakes affirming.

It is the element misgivings that the child spends too much money for example, still be time, safe, or the idea that is apprehension child too too devoted chase after a star and affect school work to wait.

This can avoid ourselves to object to object.

3, the autonomy that money uses.

We need to think, in the home, to the attributive of child money given to children as a lunar New Year gift, reach him to apply monetary autonomy, beforehand whether somewhat standard or agreement.

In the meantime, if the child does not participate in a concert, whether to have replace kind otherly, similar result also can be achieved like.

4, the demand that the Tong Chai that be the same as manage concerns.

Li clear child wants to listen to a concert to whether Tong Chai is invited make an appointment with or participate in jointly.

Sometimes, the child chases after the star, main purpose that hears a concert, it is He Tongchai has the experience that shares jointly, topic to reach discuss each other wait for attributive feeling; Or the child is very pure only the angle to Han Xing.

5, do not argue the circumstance of other classmate.

Cast when the child piece " why is some classmate OK? " to similar query, parents does not need to answer certainly.

After all, every family situation is endless and same, the comparison of very difficult also consistency. You can pullback the topic again the dialog between each other, let him tell your blame to go cannot reason.

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