Forgot when to rise, somebody begins a definition " the world of adult " , say the world of adult, it is easy to do not have 2 words but character, and wear besides wrap up in the world that I also experience adult gradually all sorts of feel sad, hard, still included all pressure, mood under cannot drain, dare not break down.
We are too sensible, dare not break down so.
Sometimes I hold out a yearning in one's childhood the sort of is opposite after parents raises a requirement, be begged and do not get make a scene cry be troubled by, true, our at least in those days dare say to understand what we want, dare because of cannot get and cry to be troubled by greatly greatly, our work that comes after that is gotten too preach managed, too sensible, dare not cry to also dare not be troubled by, instead became an alleged maturity but be in all the time however the person that bear, such person sometimes I feel too depressive, too hold back was bent.
Arrive as a child big, I am not a person that loves others incommode, do a lot of things to having his proper limits for speech or action and boundary line, from the university graduation arrives now, what dare add to bother to family friend all the time, biting a tooth to go today. I think I am a strong person all the time, carry so that move hitting still is not very see through affairs of human life and sane person, I just discover finally, before present life, I am too flimsy really, many times the brim that I feel I arrived to break down.
True, I think to look for an individual to cry too, want to look for an individual to help me too, want to let such life go quickly too, true, the life sometimes too difficult. . . . . .
In him discovery after I pay child extracurricular fee the remaining sum on card has 10 money only when,
In me great aunt looks for my video to ask about me when next the life is arranged, ask me anxiously " money is used quite, can do not have money, I turn first money gives you " when,
In me ground of flatter oneself good intention helped others, the result is cheated by others instead calumniatory when,
Ask in my Mom " you this money that won't live repeatedly is done not have, I turn thousands of to you " when,
. . . . . . .
True, I am more than the ground is covering the mouth dare not give out any sound, be afraid that they hear me crying, be afraid that they fear I pass badly, although my tear is already complete,stop not the dwelling place is dropped all the time.
But, return a crowd in, I or meeting are laughing to face everybody to face the life.
Because I know, everybody is not easy, everybody has the thing that need boils, everybody is in carrying, without what I am good complain.
Dare not break down we, because too sensible because the life is forcing we want to become strong,also become brave, the edge cries to run forth by the side of, the time of a person will be very hard very difficult, but this is a part of your life, you boil the past only, you just can survive come down.
One day, a friend says, she now too angst, want to look after children to want to seek an a bit better job again again, always cannot be like however wish, she feels she appears to wanted to break down at any time. I dare not tell her from beginning to end, I also am in same difficult position in, I am afraid of even she comforts me conversely, make the same score to her add to be anxious, then I can encourage her only, the route that all going won't be crooked road, the metropolis is effective. Yes, I know, encouraging her while I also am telling myself these. Sometimes, I also appreciate the life to also be met now and then present us a few helps are drunk encourage. When there are 10 moneys only on my card, when fearing to pay not to have another cost, so apropos the arrival of an order, for the moment alleviated my pressure, when I have a meal without money, so apropos two good friends inside two days make an appointment with me to have a meal respectively, must grab buy sheet, my forced smile is worn saying is God sees me have pity on probably, the friend does not understand so the ground scolded me sentence " nerve, what to say " after be being harmed instead however because of good intention in me, when hiding in the corner to dare not give out acoustical ground to cry all the time, the son is calling me in the room " mom, it is good that you will accompany me to see cartoon " then I stand up, brush tear, go closet washed a face, return a room, the small handgrip of son softness my encircle below, fed a potato piece eat to me, say " mom this is delicious, you also eat " , my heart begins softness a lot of. . . . . . I do not know when I can walk out of this predicament, I also did not seek the help of others, because I am very clear, we cannot ask the whole world helps you, also cannot grouse to help you without anybody, if you are valuable, natural somebody is willing to pull you, if you are too weak, then do not blame this world too cruel to you. So, I still seek way in dense fog, it is I know only, on this world, still have a lot of following I am breaking down countless times euqally the person that the brim dare not break down, also had wanted to want to abandon, had asked why oneself want to live on the world so, but want countless times to be again beside this little life that sleep soundly tries hard again, you are afraid that you abandoned him the meeting is too sad, he can bear not to rise, so you should be compared before when again a bit firmer, hold to again, try hard again.
Dear we, want countless times to break down in the life dare not break down we, you can look for cry bitterly of a place, cry the grievance in the heart, anguish, abreact come out, cry well, cry to brush brush tear, stand up continue, the life does not allow our let go, we always should give our mood an outlet, cry, cried to be done not have so afflictive.
Wish in the future, our powerful and OK not let sb down these year of our tear.
