All true love, should end one day " symbiosis " , trend " depart period " .
"Believe a person " it is difficult to have many after all?
This is enigma of a through the ages.
A lot of people can use the tone of a n experienced person to say: "Is that still used say? "Is that still used say??
Of course cannot!
You see the men and women that takes a fancy to a country thousands of years relation history, keeping 4 bloody big character: Only then abandon eventually in disorder!
Countless dread exemple does not prove, without giving thought to much more affectionate man, to finally, become likely sinister in appearance. Is the century of Xue Zhiqian and Li Yutong ripped force big fight is not before?
Hear to me so most is two kinds of words:
Former it is apprehensive, waiting to endure thunder to break off.
Latter is ignorant, assume sth as a matter of course, feel him body is in Eden.
But without doubt, although know perfectly well Shan Youhu, deflection tiger hill goes -- everybody knows the man is suspect, affection is very dangerous, but attack like flying moth however fire is same, do not know same go to a extremely dangerous area dead, for the sake of what?
Because we think too,go believing.
"Believe " this thing, resembling is bird tired needs forest old, the person is cold like wanting fire to warm, to most person, have fatal attraction.
It is above all " do not believe " too tired.
If you come to a virgin forest, it is green all round jade-like stone jade-like stone eye, dare you sleep?
If not dare if, you are about to stretch tight closely all over, be in the condition that face battle all the time, such coming down, you are about to encounter very big challenge: On one hand, you are already tumbledown, eyelid is weighed like hill; On the other hand, you cannot make yourself flabby come down absolutely again.
This moment, what you yearn for most is the place that finds an absolute safety, can make you big sleep.
If you are like a day of ground a few years to live on battlefield, what yearn for most is such " need not defence " place.
This is the paradox of an affinity: You fear the more, want the more, you want the more, with respect to what what the more you fear.
If you choose not to believe a man, had better be far from feeling so.
But be far from feeling, let you feel homeless again.
Stood by, can be burned dead; From far be afraid of again be frozen to death.
This is why female people likes to put all sorts of firm words all the time, however hard consistent reason. How does that do?
If according to before the choice of these two kinds of people, we become two kinds of women very easily.
Cannot take of these two kinds of women, depend on one's own wishful thinking: Think love is solid is mixed always motive, can put add forever.
But love is like tidewater, have flow, also have ebb tide of course.
In flood period, all love, it is extremely powerful, the man is authentic.
But one loves whether true gold, whether can the man believe, be about to look, you are in the doing of ebb-tide period.
A word: You can be the same as pleasant, but can be you sufferred from in all?
What is to be sufferred from in all?
Alleged suffer from in all, have contradictory conflict when us namely when, whether can you still retain enough cooperative ability?
Qian Zhongshu says, husband and wife should first honeymoon travels, marry again, because honeymoon journey is a metaphor actually, of its test, it is the cooperative ability of two people.
But a journey can of test really finite, because be in affection flood period, everybody is OK " act " a perfect sweetheart, and this kind " act " also be be most willing to.
A lot of women special do not understand, why the man is good to oneself so old, until when be being sent to reveal orbit, still be paradigmatic husband, paradigmatic son, paradigmatic boss, paradigmatic father, everybody is not carried give a fault to come.
But, namely such " authentic " the husband, can you also make such " treason and heresy " does the thing come?
In advisory room, the man says: "I am very tired really, so old come, I am acting a perfect man all the time, but I am not. I feel so living, too tired. Too tired..
The wife says: "Then you say with me! "Then you say with me!!
The man says: "I not dare. "I not dare..
Chen Xiaochun Vs should collect: Where is the Bug that they concern?
Why not dare?
I cite a case first.
For instance recently, a lot of people say Chen Xiaochun is mixed should collect this pair of husband and wife, it is created by nature really.
Chen Xiaochun is typical cruel disposition in recreational group, encountered should collect later, so good that resemble a cat; So why does Chen Xiaochun have so big disposition?
Caption: Say even him Chen Xiaochun, it is before him special " condole Lang is become " person. That moment is hot-tempered write difference to judge completely to harbor intermediary.
See his experience, we had the result probably.
The first, chen Xiaochun is born the home of poor, arrive thoroughly what degree, parents for the life, sell Chen Xiaochun's little brother, the little brother misses up to now, this is him is regretful all one's life.
The 2nd, elementary school moment, father ever lost him go in the country farm, going is large half an year, over he is like servile and same suffer hunger and cold, be locked up to cross a leg by iron chain even, because,return hidebound, faint a few times on the ground.
The 3rd, first one when, he is forced discontinue one's studying, went to Hong Kong along with family, work together along with father for bread. , he is done in dining-room entertain, because the client is complained,is fly in dish, by the boss in public palm slap, ask he eats to issue fly and give a client the apology on the spot even. Detest of old the tenth lunar month leaves, but this thing, became his adolescence most the experience of feel sad.
After becoming famous, his disposition is so crabbed and ruthless and cruel, mix almost all media become enemies, because,be he all scar, neither one place can be cured.
And should collect criterion as it happens is contrary, the free home such as Yu Ping of her one's previous experience, concern with parents as a child very good.
Their combination, can says complementary.
What cries complementary?
Chen Xiaochun's life resembles is hemp hot very hot, was full of colour, but too hot, often need Long of green tea wet one's whistle.
Should collect life resembles is a cup of green tea, was full of gentle, but peace and tranquility and, meet some bored, often need a few colour to feel the sense of life.
Chen Xiaochun needs happy sense, and should collect need value sense, then each other give both sides core of the other side need most in demand.
Often value sense of the woman, namely from " incubate " in obtain.
Return Chao Wei having bridge and Liu Jialing similarly to it, li An and Lin Huijia.
Liang Chaowei is indrawn and silent, liu Jialing extroversion is optimistic, liang Chaowei ever said: "Liu Jialing resembles the sun beside him, let him feel warmth is free from anxiety again. Let him feel warmth is free from anxiety again..
And overcautious and sensitive Li An is in after encountering bright and clear and bright Lin Huijia, ever said: "My happiest hour, see a madam laugh toward me namely. See a madam laugh toward me namely..
Still have famous Qian Zhongshu and Yang Jiang of course. What rate does their relation stabilize?
Once one 3 go out to have a meal, daughter all the time ground of fix eyes on is staring at adjacent desk husband and wife to quarrel. The parents that the daughter never has seen her is red cross a face, so that husband and wife quarrels to her, it is a too strange thing.
Such relation, often be a kind of structure that exceeds stability, you can anticipate it can last even one's whole life.
What kind of male support of the people concerns, can you believe?
But, if you have enough much experience, with respect to meeting discovery, it is such man, such relation, also have fluky when.
Because I had seen too much " Yang Jiang of Qian Zhongshu Vs " the marriage of type " other version " .
Not be to say the good man in the relation is reliable. However a lot of men resemble baby attaching mother on one hand same attaching wife, can monarch additionally outside secretly again on one hand " " heaven and earth, he cannot leave a wife already, also cannot leave a lover.
Whether is a love true gold solid silver, see two essential factor actually:
1. is contented
2. is not contented
Often a lot of love, just satisfy the first element, cannot reach when the 2nd element, just be the real reason that loves to be afterwards hard more very much.
What is contented?
Contented, resembling is the home that Chen Xiaochun needs a warmth, how does he become a church father's child, one can treat him softly like the elder sister, church the wife of his mirth. He was found should collect, the longing of lifetime got satisfaction.
Caption: He says, not be to should be collected married him, however he was married should collect.
But, should collect in the marriage with Chen Xiaochun, actually we have a doubt all the time:
Recumbent like Chen Xiaochun " where does father go to " such program ability and child have more photograph to get together the father of hour, be in the man of domestic brim all the year round, be how to give should collect of safe feeling?
Should collect choose Chen Xiaochun such straight male go loving, going up to also explain somehow actually, her former unripe family, the likelihood also has depressive share.
Often prince of a lot of white horses loves Cinderella, because she is enough and true,be, sufficient ground contact is angry, the life of palace is very beautiful, but very depressive however, have too much toe the line, without child child like true.
So, should collect gave Chen Xiaochun " " , and Chen Xiaochun gave should collect " wild child " .
Should collect responsible " domestication " wild child, and Chen Xiaochun is responsible " wild change " should collect.
But, their life is to have actually invisible of bomb -- Chen Xiaochun got place of a lot of life is had no, but should collect those who got she wants?
Is their love to stay in " covering layer " still went " true my layer " ?
All true love, should end one day " symbiosis " , trend " depart period " .
Be in " depart period " , what we need is not a perfect sweetheart, should face however " oneself " .
A man would rather off the rails, also dare not express oneself true opinion with the wife.
A woman would rather be borne ceaselessly off the rails, also dare not begin to belong to oneself life truly.
If we are recumbent,rely on the other side, ability is far from his scar, this love, having namely inherent " do not rely on chart " of the element.
So a lot of husband and wife discover us cannot again each other " perfect and contented " when, the flavor of true love just just begins.
For instance, chen Xiaochun received a lot of warmth slowly, begin to become OK when offerring oneself warmth, and should collect him discovery assumed too much chore, when the hope has him time; It is symbiosis period when be about to end.
Marital render outstanding service and be famous? Career waste time? Did wife Shao Hua already die? Does the disease pester a body? When life encounters all sorts of misfortunes, we can discover suddenly, actually, so called believe, it is one's own wishful thinking nevertheless, because of the icing of all love, it is an illusion, felt to have each other, oneself be short of regret to be able to be compensated, but the suffering of life, still want oneself to taste.
Can straight him face misshapen, just be the sense that a love can give us truly.
A friend tells me, she and marital conjugal love are old, but one day, the buttock that discovers the husband is staring at young girl on the ave is not put. That momently her heart is like dead ash. Her reason tells him: The man is randy. What don't this mean, but in the middle of the night when, she sleeps lightly in nightmare however.
In the dream, she asks grandmother, can be the man believed after all?
Grandmother says sturdily, suspect.
Because Lao father is a typical playboy in those days, she tells a granddaughter with the experience that sufferred from all one's life, believe a man, can be how terrible consequence.
After awaking, she looks at the man in sleeping soundly, the tear falls like rain.
Original, this kind of vagrancy that live randomly feels, did not leave her all the time, she thinks find this man, had the place of a cease, but this kind of feeling never lets off her.
And this kind of feeling, do not belong to her even, however a kind of familial inheritance, regard grandmother as the closest child, her be influenced by what one constantly sees and hears the suffering that how many grandmother regards a woman as and the hate to the man, and the longing to love?
She begins to understand, when you accepted one the individual's love, you him other part also is accepted came over.
She begins to understand, this all one's life, she so hard, so ambitious, it is actually reversing a verdict for grandmother -- to escape the weak feeling of an old-style woman, all up feeling and helpless feeling.
The sort of painful desolate in grandmother eye, she cannot resist, the nightmare that this becomes her lifetime -- I cannot suffer from a life to force the ground spends lifetime painstakingly in that way like grandmother absolutely!
Because of her cannot straight face this black hole, so this black hole controlled her lifetime, she also understands eventually, if she does not reconcile with this black hole, do not have a person to be able to save her truly.
She is act course of study, man, child nevertheless " have one's view of the important overshadowed by the trivial " , a little with self-deceiving just.
In darkness, she says to grandmother: "Grandmother, I know you are very bitter, I very feel distressed you, but, from now, I want to say good-bye with you. I want to say good-bye with you..
That momently, why her discovery wants to agree with grandmother these " 3 without " , because left grandmother, she is about alone, face cosmic Hong Huang, face the life that does not have a home to return to, but wherefrom momently, she is determined to want to look for a home to return to that belongs to her, that a home to return to is not grandmother, also not be man, career, child, everything is so called " place " .
Her place evasive, actually she should be searched, all light, it is in this darkness of round be terrified by the sight of sth or sb.
You do not have a law to believe your, this world does not have authentic person.
