Civil | Blessing forest mammy
Had you encountered the child does on the spot make a scene under a public occasion the circumstance that roll about? Is super awkwardness had?
Before two days take blessing forest to ramble supermarket, in area glacial ark, a little girl performed so, my as it happens is transient.
Little girl want to eat ice-cream, mom says: "Did not eat, you returned have loose bowels to coming yesterday, had waited to eat again. Had waited to eat again..
Little girl begin toot to have small mouth: "Not mom! I should eat, I want to eat! " mom still shakes shake one's head, who knows the girl ask mother actually: "Mom, don't you love me? " mom replies: "You this is what word, because,letting you eat is your have loose bowels, must not eat! Go! Go!!
Little girl see mom attitude is so tough, pulling mom's hand, take advantage of an opportunity is admired with respect to in the future, sit in leg of the pedal on the ground, a hand drags mom not to move her, think another hand rises her hold tight, who knows the girl lie on the ground to cry greatly directly. Transient person visits their mother and daughter 2 people, I can experience this treasure Mom to have much awkwardness.
At that time treasure Mom sends a word softly: "Was troubled by? Be troubled by mom to take you to continue to shop, not was troubled by mom to accompany you. Not was troubled by mom to accompany you..
Treasure Mom says this word, little girl cry more fiercely, the person on flies supercilious look even by the side of, what think for certain is: How this mom is in charge of without giving thought to? But what did not think of is, this child did not cry much congress, stood up, and did not cry, mom asks her: "Did not cry? Then we go. " see little girl only wipe tear, see yoghurt ran over to pointing to want yoghurt, treasure Mom says: "Good ~ " next they went away.
The supercilious look of passerby became admire, when because had seen Mom of too much treasure faces the child to make a scene,rolling about, have two kinds of state only: Or hits the child, the child can cry badlier only, say finally " do not want you " go away next, leave child place to cry all the time; Or was bought to the child, the child did not cry.
But this treasure Mom is not bought to the child, because be for the child really,be good, have loose bowels, cannot eat again cool. The child makes a scene at that time roll about pure belong to willfully make a trouble. If treasure Mom is pressed above if means of those two kinds of processing comes, can have two kinds of bad final result only.
① child does not have safe feeling more and more, always be afraid that mom does not want him.
② cries be troubled by can get benefit, mean what thing, do not give when buying, perform to make a scene roll about to be able to be satisfied.
And although this treasure Mom lets the child cry made period of time, but it is however most the canal uses. Also treasure Mom need to learn, face willfully make a trouble, make a scene the child that roll about, we need to do 3 things only, also can saying is " tender and sturdy " .
? Await patiently
The child is troubled by, it is a kind of means of his mood drain, it is the mood that he still does not know how to control his only, also do not know communal situation is so bad, cannot restrain oneself mood so. What mom should do is to await patiently, look at the child to be troubled by.
When before be being written down, Li Mei Professor Jin says the child cries, drag him in the room, you move a bench to sit to him, let him cry, when crying, the child can open an eye 3 times. First time is goggle, see you look at him, he cries to look to you, the 2nd goggle, you were not moved, the child sees, can think: Still look at again, how to return apathetic? I cry tired. The 3rd goggle: Apathetic still? Calculated did not cry.
Li Mei Jin teachs this appearance to be able to say is very figure, the child is such, each his practice, also be to exploring, explore your bottom line, explore how to be done, you can satisfy him, when him discovery is used without giving thought to so when, also used no longer.
? Tender company
" mom accompanies you " , let the child know you can be beside him, did not abandon he, do not have pair of his ignore, this is tender expression, and informed the word that the child does not make, can have what kind of favour happening, the child cannot understand immediately in in a fit of anger likely, but, he cries a little while to wanted to understand, and your patience, give him the time that think namely.
? The manner is sturdy
Sturdy manner is not equal to strong manner, be not bought even if do not buy, do what one says, premise is to should let the child know you cannot satisfy the reason that he asks this, cry make the decision that cannot change you, make a scene roll about more cannot, the child also knows advance and retreat.
To those feeling that the child is communal the circumstance cries the mom that makes hindering outer part, likelihood the manner is not sturdy, bought to the child first, let him do not cry to say again, but the child knows such working effective, satisfy him for the first time when you, he still comes the 2nd times, becoming him the 2nd times still is such when, you do not satisfy him sturdily, he may become aggravated the ground changed to sit on the ground, you satisfied him, the 3rd times you have did not satisfy, he can lie possibly rolled about on the ground, one pace is forced this kind of blackguardly way of the child can say come out.
So from willfully make a trouble of child first time when, be about sturdy oneself manner.
Important clew: If of the child cry be troubled by had affected another person, remember adopting the child, reach quiet place, await company.
