Popular science ask when the child why mom wants to borrowed, mom answer can cause what distinct effect to the child
Very much on-the-job mom expresses, when oneself go to work everyday, the child's pitiable station is in doorway, ask why mom wants to go to work, this makes mom sad unceasingly, but the child gives out this kind of doubt, not be curious really, just want to let parents accompany. This moment, how does mom reply, still have very big effect to child itself
The first mom: "Go to work to eat to your try to win sb's favor "
Small Ling has 3 years old of much children, she and husband go to work, grandmother helps belt, a day, mom should go to work, the child is pulling mom not to let go, the child asks mom wants where to go to, mom answer says: "Mom goes to work, come back to be taken to you delicious. Can come back to accompany darling in the evening. Can come back to accompany darling in the evening..
He " oh " , seemed to understand like.
Later, ask him when others " where does your mom go to? Ask him when others " where does your mom go to??
He can reply: "Mom try to win sb's favor going to work eats went. "Mom try to win sb's favor going to work eats went..
If he did not take care to make a fault, broke the thing of grandmother for instance, grandmother asks how he does, he can reply: "Mom goes to work buy. " do so that grandmother finds both funny and annoying.
It is it seems that in his heart, mom goes going to work can buy a whole world.
The 2nd mom, complain
Same thing happening is on the body of Ms. Liu, ms. Liu is an office worker, the family is a family of husband and wife both at work, salary of original young couple is not high, since had baby, live very to have pressure almost, mom often comes off work very late.
This day of Ms. Liu should go to work, the child asks mom wants where to go to, ms. Liu said a word that complain however, still say " mom is so painstaking, is everything still for you? You want sensible, we is poor, if mom does not go to work, what to take to feed you? What to take to feed you??
After this makes the child again compunctious, self-abased in spend, he always becomes aware he follows other child is different, when be contacted with other child, return · of · of a little cowardly · even
Why the child can ask this kind of problem the child asks this question
Just prefer mom, hope mom gives him more company.
Lie in mom bosom to the top of one's bent act like a spoiled child, hear the voice of mom tenderness, or it is the cate that eats mom to do... , the days that is together with mom is very happy, the child is together with mom, also be the child at the same time it is one kind is depended on, one kind likes.
But mom is not in the home, the child cannot enjoy the time that is together with mom, he can think mom.
"Mom, why you should go to work? " when the child asks this kind of question, how should the parent do?
This moment, let the child understand mom to be able to return the home inside booked time, it is the thing that mom should do above all, let the child expect somewhat, not perfunctory, want to be treated seriously. Letting the child experience mom is serious to each his problem, the child also can go down seriously all the time accordingly.
We go to work the most original intent is to make money really shop. Often can blurt out, must not tell him only to make money, and ask he small knows life need dream even reach take on. Mom's answer can decide life structure of the child, just cannot say.
Shop to be close to the child's acknowledge most, follow the child also is be closely bound up at the same time, tell the child to buy the thing that he likes most, and tell him can come back in the evening, he can understand immediately.
Face this kind of problem, how should the parent reply
Make clear the original intention that the child asks this question, to the child one expects
Apparent, the child asks this word, do not have what purpose, just want to let mom accompany him. If as the parent you do not know how to reply temporarily, did not think good, might as well say " after late mom comes off work, can come back to accompany you; " or " it is good to wait for mom to rest to be able to take you to play on the weekend! Mom comes home in the evening again fine fine ground tells you! Mom comes home in the evening again fine fine ground tells you!!
If answer bad meeting to have the effect with bad what to the child
Give no cause for more criticism, one of purposes that go to work are for the need of the life, all recreation in the home cannot leave money, after having child especially, labour firewood estate is major, the salary that relies on a person only supports a family, it is the thing of a very disloyal border.
But if say to complain with the child how oneself work hard,make money, ask the child wants hard how to be like in the future why, the parent thinks told translate general principle, taught the child, but the child is the child after all, go to completely ground listening to so much general principle without time, even if told him to be able to not understand certainly, more possible meeting is bemused.
He can value the value of money very much, after be brought up, surpass everything to the lay particular stress on of money, always say to go to work even if shop with the child, this kind of thought is met ground of exert a subtle influence on lets him build such consciousness, after the child is grown, the meeting is projectile go up in him body, working purpose also can be to make money. If do not have money to still can become self-abased, sound moral quality is established very hard.
The parent goes going to work to make money only not only this one purpose, still have a lot of other reasons. Tell him for money, he will be valued very much to money, tell him for ideal, he can plant little cause in psychology below, tell him to blend in a society, he can value human concern more, the parent's answer is very important, shopping is a temporary reply only, the parent still should want how to reply well, not pattern demarcate is in shop on lowermost pursuit, want to have a few higher end.
I am candied mom, it is division of infant of an advanced Yo, also be the mom of 4 years old of darling, in Yo any problems that encounter in the process can ask me, hope my a bit proposal can help you solve the trouble in the process that bring child and quandary.
