Once heard a paragraph of word in broadcasting station, deep think like that.
"Face admire long already person in the heart, it is to should choose to continue to become a friend, bold still profession? Bold still profession??
" ask yourself, this individual, are you willing more the friend that TA becomes you or lover? If so be afraid of, bury it in the bottom of the heart, become forever friend! Become forever friend!!
The condition of be in a dilemma of this kind of kink, for the term of intention a Confucian school of idealist philosophy of the Song and Ming Dynasties, produced double hasten to avoid namely conflict, namely two option want, but have advantageous disadvantage each again, make a decision in order to be determined hard. Resemble this question, face admire long already person in the heart, the sweetness when getting along and tacit understanding, want days, appearance one case to stay together really. But, profession succeeding is everyone is happy, if do not have,succeed, be to connect a friend to be done not have so that do? And, the truth of world of a general is, the friend maintains long good relationship more easily than the lover. The relationship that still maintains a friend then, can meet to care all the time all the time at least. But, a so right person, the friend that becomes all one's life only, can express love with the friend's identity only, true not reconciled to...
So, How should choose after all?
Normally, when facing the condition of such be in a dilemma, my method is -- sentence which option to abandon the following consequence beforehand, it is me wish to accept least of all or be least of all can susceptive, I choose which, next wait for one's chance and move or be to try hard for it.
For instance in those days tall when ending division of cent of unity and coherence in writing, liberal art science department is my place love, do not know after all to should be read article or read manage. And regard elder literature youth as, think oneself can learn liberal art all the time when junior high school. That time, liberal art is taken an examination of hard not only and bad still to apply for a job, and if still having a thorough popular feeling: Learn several manage to change, walk along the world to not be afraid of. Do the work plus the controller of teacher of division of unity and coherence in writing by turns, let teen-age I more kink is spellbound. So that the president is flat,approve especially, it is clear that the time that gave me a summer vacation lets me want what should learn in the future... later, because cannot accept liberal art to want the time of mechanical memorizing,I am, cannot accept the joy that dissolves a problem without several manage, chose science department in a college finally, never regret. This is me to solved the problem of a be in a dilemma for the first time with such method, preliminary the trend that decided my future life. (just, there still is an episode at that time. Agreed to want to learn liberal art with a diehard followers originally, so that she thinks I am,abandoned ideal by force of pressure, abandoned the agreement with her, follow my break off relations so she cannot understand ~ to do several manage to change a title to still have joy. Of course, diehard followers can be diehard followers, no matter,depend on how, final metropolis has been been attributed to again. )
Again for instance, the university graduates, comply with by force of pressure the opinion in the home, went the designing institute works. The chance is good still, income also is pretty good, leave home close also. It is I am overcome only institution that one day that can visit in the end, still decide to want to come out to enter so swing. So, I work hard hard to learn hard to make money, put enough capital is experienced craft, working 3 years half later, the choice comes to Shenzhen and found proper job smoothly, be in this resident, take root. Before making a decision, not be to had not experienced hesitation and pendulous, be in the job in the courtyard is handy after all, family friend is beside, the life is easy and comfortable and comfortable. Enter alone swing Shenzhen, all sorts of hardship need not think flavor to be able to know more therein. To now, in those days the courage that colleague friend still still says to admire me. Support me to make this choice, only reason that props up me to go to today, namely -- the day that I had not wished to be able to look at in the end.
? I won't imagine, the success that certain chooses to be able to be brought likely or it is happy, make a decision with this for the basis. The one side that imagines a thing is good always is too too deft and make the person loses vigilance easily, feel true by accident. And the one side that analyses bad can make a person sober and hold fight, then ponders over countermeasure, opposite meeting more distinguish advantages and disadvantages easily.
? In a word, do not know how to should be chosen when you namely when, what is what go thinking you do not want, is not to think what you want desperately.
Actually, thought when you what you want a long time, also know to want how to be done, and meaning excessive succeed a long time the following setting, still do not have however resolved go doing, can show two issues only -- it is you not be true so want, 2 be you is subconscious in, the meeting that does not believe ending is true is so good.
? So, the method of dispel the clouds and see the sun-restore justice is, want to be clear about what place cannot accept to abandoning which is you, let go next one wrestle, the calm faces a result, not kink, not character regret.
Push and wide, this method, basically apply to the hour of be in a dilemma of kink of the great majority in the life, face life especially major choice when.
Actually, wanted to understand this reason, a lot of works did not make a decision so hard. Archaism has the cloud early: Fish and bear's paw cannot hold concurrently. Most when, the more kink, the more the problem of be in a dilemma, can be A or B only the more, cannot be A and B. So, choose yourself instantly most want -- namely you can lose least of all that.
Return piece that problem, if you most those who fear is also cannot see TA again, also cannot care TA to take care of TA again, that buries love greatly bottom of the heart, the name with the friend accompanies the left and right sides. If you dare love to dare be hated, take, put, place of that brave angle loves, do not lose deep feeling.
Life chooses composition by countless, or big or small, or hold the balance or be not worth mention. In the choice of every time, make us ceaseless grow, the ceaseless and perfect, ceaseless ego that weigh model, decided we become what kind of person finally.
Terrible is not a choice, abandon directly however, or it is to have no alternative. Perhaps, hold to again so, can see dawn, see rainbow.
