I once had had such experience:
There are a few schoolgirls to go affectionately together in front, I call them aloof, they see me later, not only differ I, laughing to run away at the same time at the same time instead;
Walk into a classroom, see a flock of girls surround happy ground together to chat, go by as me, their break up a hubbub;
Be in the school, lunch moment, be willing to sit together to have a meal with me without the person in the dining room.
I at that time do not know my err what, this kind by the repellent, experience that is rejected, brought deep ashamed sense to me. I suspect where to there is on him body in a lot of years incorrect, have where fault, where be although he cannot know,, bring about me to cannot be loved, I also had believed a kind to that is even " fate " . Till the last few years, I just begin to be planted with this " struggle " obtain reconcile.
I think today and everybody, talk about gregarious repulsion together.
Above all, encounter gregarious repulsion, can cut cogent fact to bring negative effect to the person, include the following fields:
1. affects health of body and mind badly
Be not admitted by the group beside oneself, the psychology that can affect a person badly even physiology is healthy.
In all sorts of negative experience, "Once was notted allow by compeer group place " it is very easy be underestimated. Old people thinks this is the bagatelle between the child only sometimes, but in fact, it can bring the anger of a lot of extremes, depressed, jealousy and sadness. On physiology for, those person Morpheus quality that are repelled in socialization are poorer also, because the function of their immunity system is inferior to those people of gregarious be on speaking terms.
2. mood manages occurrence problem
Be repelled in socialization, can reduce the expression when a person is handling complex intellective task. The child that investigation and study makes clear to those are repelled can appear the expression that school work drops. It still can bring aggressiveness and actuation pilot issue. Have a few very clever children, although held school work,be being issued by repellent circumstance, also showed the issue that mood impulse manages in long-term life.
3. loses attributive sense
Suffer repulsion when ground of people day after day, slowly, they recover the ability of attributive feeling to be able to be lost thoroughly. They become depressed, helpless, feel be not yearned for, be not needed, be not loved. They also can not find self-worth sense, no matter was obtained,look seem what kind of success, the heart decides meeting and their very closely associated with each other to the inaccuracy of self-worth.
Perhaps we can not change the other side to repel our fact, but, we still can change ourselves to be opposite the view of this fact and state of mind.
1.By the fault that repulsion is not you, its happening has very big random sex
The group is blind. Repel happen below the reason that can differ in countless kinds.
Human nature is very complex, have extreme kind already, what also have an extreme is evil, and two kinds of extremes are OK bona fide, coexist at the same time on one individual body. Be repelled you are not " undeserved " , and repel your a lot of people also are not " evil " person. Such wanting, oppugn and criticize severely what can reduce ego already, also can reduce the fear of human to future relation and anger.
2.Those who develop opposite work is reasonable anticipate
Above all, we should give out such hypothesis: You are in what everybody wins in rectifying an individual to be born impossibly to be kind to. If those rejected to happen with repulsion, accept it, as a part that person meaning is like very much in the life. An opposite expects reasonably to be able to help you alive the experience of calmer look upon anguish. Anguish lives namely originally cannot an evasive part.
3.Realize the past has gone
Realize you were in the past no longer you, the environment that your environment also is at that time no longer. You can try to know new person with new way gradually. Sometimes because we are experienced to what be repelled too remember profundity too, also be affected to the understanding of oneself subsequently. We think we are be not loved, also won't be loved, because this stopped early to others close footstep. Actually, tried to just know; The meeting in the process that even if is trying experiences the signal that refuse strongly, feel fear, ashamed, embarrassment, but do not try, forever alone.
4.If you still are in a circumstances that is repelled
Still facing the painful situation that is isolated when you when, ought to seek the support of other natural resources. Most moment, we can hide such thing in the heart, because feel embarrassed,mix ashamed, do not be willing to allude to other; Also may be we did not take such anguish seriously adequately. But in fact, this kind of anguish is should be treated by gravity, and appeal to honest person, parents, close friend, or psychology seeks advice from division.
Also occasionally, the reason that a person is repelled, because he does not belong to that place really,be merely. He is destined to want to go to other world natively, wider world -- " you think you and week meet with antipathetic, it is a Triton of the minnows only actually. It is a Triton of the minnows only actually..
Had you ever had the experience that is repelled? You how is at that time do? Hope you can share your story with us, expect everybody's return!
About psychology, does everybody still expect to the knowledge of what respect understand? Also welcome to leave a message we.
