Father's company and caress, it is important to have many to the child? When do this see enough let your long narrow flag wake up to reality like that
Contain contain sees father rarely since begin to remember things, the father because of contain contain all the year round outer job, constant ability of a few months comes home, come home to still be not waited for go up how to long be about. Because,be such, contain contain concerns with father as a child is not particularly good, especially contain contain " period of be shy with strangers " when, every time father comes home, contain contain can hide in mom and grandmother back, and begin very fear to be contacted with grown man.
After the nursery school on contain contain, there always are grandmother, grandfather and mom to attend only in home of contain of domestic activity contain every time, see when contain contain other little girl has two people of father mother to be in beside when company, contain contain is unavoidable feel sad.
Nursery school prepares to organize domestic athletic meeting again, father promises contain contain to be able to hurried back will accompany contain contain to attend. Contain contain is good not easy when games that day, wait only however come video phone of father, urgent ground of contain contain gas is loud to video that father cries: "I most be fed up with father! "I most be fed up with father!!
Hear a daughter cry cry, contain contain father is very compunctious, "Put down the job to raise child of not lively wife, took the job not to accompany the child " , contain contain father was immersed in in brooding.
At the door nursery school of each old elementary school, arrive putting what see between class hour is grandfather grandma, mom mostly will receive the child, now and then 9 father that receive the child want the for a long time that be looked up and down by someone else. Even the parent of the school activity of meeting, family also is old person and mom attend for the most part, delicacy is little the father that sees the child. Of father absent child grow, became the current situation that instantly society family teachs.
One, be accompanied without father and caress pair of children to have a lot of bad effects
1, cannot build affinity with others
If the feeling of the child and father is bad, the child cannot accept the ways one gets along with others then from father, wait for social skill with person association, such child feels to fear constantly when facing stranger, dare not establish close, trustful relationship actively with the person.
2, let the child lack safe sense
Father can give the child a kind of lofty, enough credit, effective amount and can give a person enough and safe sense figure. Be accompanied when what father lacks in growing process of the child and caress, can let the child lose this kind of safe sense, this can bring not little impact to the child's body and heart.
3, those who affect the child to be fastened to the gender is divisional
In be in without father the guiding of direction of child sexual distinction, the child appears easily " sexual amlposition " . "The boy is easy Nancy, girl male is changed " this is now a kind of very common society phenomenon. In the help the child distinguishs above sexual distinction, father's education is more intuitionistic than the mother and more effective. If the child is in the domestic environment that is short of the love that miss father,be brought up, so divisional to sexual distinction meet very ambiguous.
4, the marriage that affects the child is loved view
The person that does not have method and different sexual distinction in the child below the domestic environment that only the mother fosters gets along intimately, such child is brought up not to know how to get along with the male, also do not know how to be communicated with the male, affect child love and marriage thereby. Because the child is short of the environment that misses father to fall,be brought up again, the age is favored after the girl is brought up especially bigger than oneself or it is the man that can give oneself safe sense like father, together with does not have the experience that gets along with the male, be harmed easily on feeling.
5, the disposition that affects the child
The mother is the part that acting tender, softness normally in the family, if the child is long-term below the influence of maternal education, form easily escape, cowardly, self-abased wait for undesirable disposition.
In recent years " Yo of type of bereft of one's spouse " " Yo of cheat cadaver type " be mentioned ceaselessly, this proves whole big environment plays father absent in fostering child process phenomenon is commonner and commonner. Seem mom should be the main force that rears the child, and it is OK that fathers need to fall or do not appear complete from time to time only. It is what reason after all so, brought about father to be become in the process that rears the child " army deserter " ?
2, what reason causes the child to lose father major company and caress?
1, the job is busy, do not have method to take out time to accompany the child.
Below social environment of home, although Chinese female assumes office,lead outclass Asia other country, but Chinese male still bears the domestic heavy responsibility that had much. House, car, child and parents, have Chinese distinguishing feature especially " singleton female " generation, the difficult task that is approached on Chinese man body is increasing, competitive pressure is greater and greater, male brethrens can devote naturally to work only.
2, the thing that feels raising the child is a woman.
The feudal tradition of the below a few chiliad on our country is " male advocate outside, female advocate inside " , feel to raise the issue that the child should be a woman. Oneself are outer dozen go all out, create good corporeal living conditions to wife and child, can reduce domestic communication necessarily. But actually eye comes round to say, the obtain employment of our country female leads far outclass other country, chinese female besides should assume give birth to those who raise the child " important task " , make money with the male even raise the home. More what is more,the rather that, even if is the full-time mom that did not work, rear the child this thing a bit also unlike go to work make money relaxed.
3, the collect inside father disposition or crude, accompany the child without patience.
The disposition of some father collect of ten one's duty, these father are affected consuetudinarily for a long time by the tradition, likely they are in father generation there those who accept is such emotional communication means, normally so not to be pooh-poohed undertakes communicating at the child. Return some father disposition cruder and absolute, do not have method to accept the child " destroy custom " behavior, also get along without patience and child so.
4, feeling of the parents in the family is disharmonious.
The child that lacks father love is in a disharmonious family, major child is deflection mother. Get along because of mother and oneself time is the longest, best to oneself. Once the feeling between parents is bad, often wrangle, child nature is met from feeling deflection mother, meet with the estrangement between father so bigger and bigger, bring about father and son thereby (female) between do not have method to communicate.
However, the health of a child grows is need mother those who caress the company with father, only parents has acted his part in the process that rears the child, ability rears an outstanding child. If a father is absent at ordinary times of the child grow, meet the child cause a few bad effects.
3, if do not have father to only maternal company can let the child,lack a few idiosyncratic
1, recreant and self-abased
There is in every child heart " strong " father, can help oneself keep out wind and rain, antagonism everything is difficult. Every child is father is small " vermicelli made from bean starch " , the company that hopes to be able to obtain father and approbate. If father interacts with the child at ordinary times little, the child's heart obtains father's approbating not easily, such children can think father does not like him, feel not self-confident, lack safe sense even. Meet those who make the child long-term cannot get close person approbate so, form self-abased, recreant disposition.
2, do not have responsibility heart
In domestic education, father is acting " bear the blame " the person's part, father need bears the blame to the wife, bear the blame to the child, bear the blame to the job. Father's company can tell the child he can want to act a what kind of part socially in the future, want the what kind of responsibility since the burden, establish a good example to the child.
3, do not have definite idea
In the family of Chinese tradition, father is " authoritative " the existence like, no matter be to do a decision to still give a proposal, it is the business that father shares mostly. The child can encounter him to do not have the issue that method handles in the hard to avoid in growing, this kind of moment seeks father's help to be able to give child huge hope, arrive to handle the way of the problem alone with study. But if do not have father to be done to the child,guide, child of if things go on like this can become without definite idea, drift with the tide, method is handled independently and did not face a problem.
In the process that rears the child, a lot of independence, self-confident, optimistic the child place that only mom fosters does not have wait for outstanding disposition. Serving as a competent father so is not to be absorbed in making money raise the home, should take an active part in the child however grow and teach.
4, how should be the father on the road that rears the child done?
1, love a wife, establish a good example to the child.
The best family on the world is taught even if parental feeling is good, domestic harmony. The family with harmonious relationship of husband and wife, can give the child a good example, such child often nature is more good, psychology is more healthy also, to the child in the future marriage is loved view also can give positive effect.
2, esteem child, hold to be as good as one's word.
A lot of father to dismiss of the child pester, promise the child's requirement with respect to blurt out. But actually, often be to break one's promise at the child. Little imagine injured the child to feel to father's accredit not only so, also destroyed safe feeling of the child, also can bring bad influence to the child's disposition even, become not dewy-eyed person, get along with other hard.
3, smoke time to accompany the child one case amuse oneself.
The force of father man decided mom of a lot of game does not have method to replace father, father is in with child play when, the child can feel the force of thinking means of father, male and dedicated power, to the child growing is very advantageous.
4, put down a mobile phone, accompany attentively.
A lot of father look be like rest to accompany the child in the home, however phone, game is ceaseless. Obviously the child is before, staring at mobile phone laugh only however, such company still is inferior to be not being accompanied. Father since plan to accompany the child, be inferior to dropping the job temporarily, put down a mobile phone, give the child a bit time, the intention, high quality ground accompanies the child, the child will be more happy.
Of the child grow once, missed cannot turn round again. No matter work again busy, business is again much, even if take out 15 minutes to loosen body and mind to accompany the child everyday, again again much after all trouble, much ground is sad, the child's smiling face is best medicine.
I am small letter mom, I am hopeful and optimistic, be happy to share the most practical Yo the treasure Mom of knowledge and experience.
